Sometimes I wonder,

How my mind, just one day became layers and layers and layers of deep unusual thoughts scattered all over the place. I wonder how, I opened my eyes to things I had never even thought before. If I sit still in one place for too long my mind just takes off and won’t stop. Sometimes I like it, it feels good to be complex, but then again sometimes I pray for silence. Sometimes I wish I could think nothing at all. It can be quite over whelming. But then again, I can spend 2weeks alone, by myself, and never get ‘bored’. I enjoy being alone more than I enjoy being surrounded by people, just because my thoughts are much clear, and they are just mine. When people are everywhere you turn, you forget to stop and think for yourself. Realize where you stand, and what you represent. Yeah, sometimes I’ll just roll with the punches, sit back and relax, but at the end of the day, Im the one who creates my Peace of mind. Not a drug. Not a person. Not a song. Not a movie.

Shit, these days I don’t even have to write as much as I used to for an outlet, I can just let my mind wander, even though 99% of the time, I catch myself confused as to why I ended up on that specific thought.

These days, love is the last thing I wish for. Actually, love is nothing I want from one individual. I love my family, and my bestfriends, and thats all this girl needs and wants. I couldn’t imagine chaining myself down to one single person. Always wondering about their thoughts, feelings, and needs. Maybe I truly am selfish when it comes to things like that, but I feel like Id save someone a lot of trouble just avoiding the relationship situation all together. Because it’s almost guaranteed that I will break your heart into a million little pieces, and not shed a single tear. Id shrug and walk away. 

Maybe Im heartless.

Maybe Im too lost in my mind to get back out.

But I don’t mind, nope, I do not mind.

No room for weakness. Game face.

Its hard,

Being with each other but not being together. Its hard because i see the perfection when we see one another, hell everyone else sees it too.

I believe in fate, imma take my chances, put some undercover hope into you, when i say… I know our love will get a round two.

arianaappleseed:

Realizing what I can have with this guy is scaring me, I’m really trying not to distance myself from him cause that’s what I usually do. It’s a good thing he’s the one who calls and text first all the time. I like that shit. 

(via ferrferr)